Men

Men jokes

Three men walk into heaven at the same time. They all live in the same city. God asks the first man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I have a heart condition, and I've been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. Anyway, I get home from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hanging off the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guy's fingers! He falls into a bush, so I throw a refrigerator on him." God asks the next man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I was cleaning the windows, and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! Luckily, I fall safely in a bush! But then a refrigerator falls on me!" God asks the third man, and he says, "I was the one in the fridge!"

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  • A female class teacher was having a problem with a boy in her class in Grade 3.

    The boy said, "Madam, I should be in Grade 4. I am smarter than my sister & she's in Grade 4".

    The Madam had heard enough and took the boy to the principal. The principal decided to test the boy with some questions from Grade 4.

    *Principal:* What is 3+3?

    *Boy:* 6.

    *Principal:* 6+6.

    *Boy:* 12.

    The boy got all the questions right. The principal told the Madam to send the boy to Grade 4 immediately. The Madam decided to ask her own questions and the principal agreed.

    *Madam:* What does a cow have 4 of that I have only 2?

    *Boy:* Legs.

    *Madam:* What is in your trousers that I don't have?

    *Boy:* Pockets.

    *Madam:* What starts with a C and ends with T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?

    *Boy:* Coconut.

    *Madam:* What goes in hard & then comes out soft & sticky?

    The principal's eyes opened really wide, but before he could stop the answer, the boy was taking charge

    *Boy:* Bubble gum.

    *Madam:* You stick your pole inside me. You tie me down to get me up, I get wet before you do.

    *Boy:* Tent.

    *The principal was looking restless*

    *Madam:* A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you are bored. The best man always has me first?.

    *Boy:* Wedding ring.

    *Madam:* I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I Drip. When you blow me, you feel good?

    *Boy:* Nose.

    *Madam:* I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates, I come with a quiver.

    *Boy:* Arrow.

    *Principal:* O MY GOD.

    *Madam:* What starts with 'F' and ends wit a 'K' and if you don't get it, you've to use your hand?

    *Boy:* Fork.

    *Madam:* What is it that all men have, it's longer in some men than others, the Pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after marriage?

    *Boy:* Surname.

    *Principal:* Ohooo !

    *Madam:* What part of the man has no bone but has muscles with a lot of veins like pumpkin and is responsible for making love?

    *Boy:* Heart.

    *Principal:* Eeeeeh! The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the Madam, "Send this bloody boy to the university. I myself got all the answers wrong!"

    What do you call a gay man that is not physically handicapped that performs blowjobs on gay men that are physically handicapped?

    Caregiver.

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  • What do you call physically handicapped, homophobic, heterosexual men and women in wheelchairs?

    Mixed nuts.

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  • Why do gay men like the filling in Hostess Twinkies?

    It reminds them of cum. πŸ˜‹ 😍 😏 😜

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  • What do gay men like cocks?

    🍦🍦🍦 they like the cream filling πŸ˜‹

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  • What do physically handicapped gay men do after they are done belching? They wipe their mouths on their light blue handkerchiefs after they are done sucking cocks.

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  • Why do four polish heteroflexable men like to suck on four of the cow's udders? Because a bull has only one.

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  • Why do bisexual men πŸ‘¨ πŸ‘© πŸ‘¨ love gay men bisexual men don't love gay men πŸ‘¬ πŸ‘¨ πŸ‘¨ they just wanted to suck gay men's πŸ‘¬ cocks 🌭 🌭 because they πŸ‘ πŸ‘ like their 🍨 🍨 🍦 🍦 cream filling πŸ˜‹ ☺ πŸ’• πŸ’– πŸ€— 😊 πŸ˜‹ ☺ πŸ’• πŸ’– πŸ€— 😊 πŸ˜‹ ☺

    Why did a minister who is a Christian nationalist and a bisexual man give anonymous blowjobs to physically handicapped gay men under the handicapped stalls inside the men's restrooms at a rest area?

    He wanted to eat footlong hotdogs for lunch at the rest area, but he wanted a sample first (taster).

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  • 😳 😳 😳 what can a physically handicapped β™Ώ πŸ‘¬ πŸ‘¨ πŸ‘¨ gay man can do better than a physically handicapped β™Ώ bisexual man πŸ‘¨ πŸ‘© πŸ‘¨ πŸ€” when his πŸ‘„ mouth is wide open 😍 when his head is sticking out under the stall inside the men's 🚹 restroom 🚻 at a rest 😴 area 😴 suck the chrome of a tall pipe πŸ‘„

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  • πŸ€” What do gay men who are physically handicapped β™Ώ can do better than a man who is heteroflexible when πŸ€” he has another man's 😍 πŸ˜‹ 😜 😏 😳 πŸ˜‰ cock inside πŸ˜‹ of his warm mouth πŸ‘„ πŸ‘„ give a πŸ‘ πŸ‘ good blowjob?

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  • What do you call the penises of gay men that are in wheelchairs?

    Meals on wheels πŸ˜‹πŸ˜πŸŒ­πŸŒ­πŸŒ­πŸŒ­πŸŒ­

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  • What can a physically handicapped β™Ώ gay man πŸ‘¬ do on his own very well πŸ‘ without being taught how to do?

    Perform fellatio on gay men.

    Three men were going for a drive through the desert. An hour later, the car breaks down. They all take something from the car to keep themselves cool as they walk to the nearest gas station a few miles back.

    One guy grabs a hand-held fan. Another guy grabs the jug of water. The last guy takes the car door off. About 15 minutes into walking, the other two are giving the one guy weird looks. Finally, one of them asks why he is taking the car door. The third guy just replies that whenever he gets hot he can just roll down the window.

    Why do heterosexual men and heterosexual women believe that bisexual men don't exist because male bisexuality doesn't exist? Because it doesn't cycle 🚲.

    Why do gay men and lesbians believe that bisexual men don't exist because there is no such thing as male bisexuality?

    Because it doesn't cycle 🚲.

    Why do gay men want to eat each other's meat because meat is meat, and man has to eat meat?

    What do gay men like to suck each other's bananas because they like the ice cream filling?