Lightsaber

Lightsaber Jokes

Jedi

Why does the Jedi never join the dark side?

If they did, then they would lose the opportunity to molest young padawans.

Time

Every time a Light Saber goes off, it's just a Jedi Master getting hard over a kid. Lol.

School shooting

So, in "Revenge of the Sixth" when Anakin goes and kills the younglings, I thought to myself, "Hey, it’s just another day in an American school."

Half

Obi-Wan be like:

"To Darth Maul, lightsabers are blue, lightsabers are red. I cut you in half, why the fuck aren’t you dead?"

Sand

Anakin Skywalker: I don't like sand.

*also him*

Anakin Skywalker: I lived on sand.

Star Wars

Why did the Star Wars movies come out 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3?

Yoda was in charge of scheduling.

Orphan

Why can't an orphan role-play Star Wars?

Because they have no one to play Darth Vader.

Condom

Why did people invent glow in the dark condoms?

So gay people can have lightsaber duels.

Jedi

What do you call a Jedi teacher who lives in a forest?

Obi-Wan Canopy

Solo

Rey: Join me, Ben, you don't have to be alone anymore, join me.

Ben: But Rey, I've always been solo.

Son

Stormtrooper: Hey Palpatine! Luke is Vader's son.

Palpatine: Knew it.

Divorce

What did Yoda say to Luke during his wedding ceremony?

"May divorce be with you."

Jedi

What do you call a Jedi that can use the force to fly?

A Jedi Flight.

Movie

Why did the Star Wars movies come out in the sequence 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3? -- Because Yoda was in charge of the sequence.

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