sci-fi jokes
What do you call it when an Astartes cum's... torrential downfall?
Why do cat orphans watch sci-fi movies?
Because they won't understand what the mother ship is.
Why don't Jedi like their female relatives?
Because they are Sith-ters.
If they made a movie about your sex life, what would the title be?
Mine would be "Alien Vs. Predator."
I got fired from the library in the first 30 minutes because I "womens rights" in the sci-fi fiction section.
What did Darth Trump Vader say to evil emperor Putin?
Yessssss, MEaster!
What do you call a nervous Jedi?
Panakin.
What do your underwear and the Starship Enterprise have in common?
They are both concerned about “Klingons near your anus”.
My dick actually destroyed the Death Star.
What did the two crewmates say when they were hanging on a rope? Polus up!
I bought a Dalek egg timer recently...
After a few minutes, it shouts, "Eggs terminate!"
This isn't an orphan joke, but I got a job at a library, but it only lasted 15 minutes. Turns out, books about women’s rights shouldn’t go in the Sci-Fi / Fantasy section.
What do Star Trek and toilet paper have in common?
Both fly around Uranus and wipe out Klingons!
Scientist time travels into the year 2024.
Scientist: So, what happened with the storming of Area 51?
Pedestrian: Oh, you mean The 51 Massacre?
I was in my first space mission for NASA. As we were orbiting the asteroid belt, I saw a figure. I couldn’t tell who it was, but he spoke Spanish with an Argentinian accent. He said, “I’m looking for my freekicks and penalties, can you help me find them?” We then decided to aid him.
North Korea and the Martians were fighting about who was going to reach Venus first.
Trump steps in and says, "That doesn't matter, America is going to land on the sun first."
The Martians and North Korea said, "You can't land on the sun, it's too hot and you will die."
Trump said his brilliant plan, "America is going to land there at night."
If Stephen Hawking was in a horror movie, would he make his robot try and shout, "Aaaaaaaah! Help me, I can't move! I'm too scared!"?
Odo walks down the alley and turns into a bar.
Your race's favorite Star Wars Characters:
Arab...Admiral Ackbar (Allahu Akbar)
East Asian...Qui-Gon Jinn (Ching-Chong-Wing-Wong)
Jew...Rey (Ray)
Black...BB-8 (BBC)
Italian...Jabba the Hutt (Pizza Hut)
German...Admiral Piett (Hitler)
What do you call a kid watching Star Wars by themselves?
Hans Solo.
What does the starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?
Answer: They both circle Ur-Anus looking for Kling-Ons!