Kids jokes
Your soul is black. I have 4 guns, little kid. Get in the van before I shoot you!
How do Ephippians celebrate their kids' first birthday?
Put a flower on their gravestone.
Ugly face dude: Hi kiddo!
Kid: Hi kid. Leaves.
Kid turns back and says: Wait a minute, who are you?
Why are kids so skinny?
Parents eat all the food themselves, and let the kids starve.
Mia’s mother has 5 kids: Lilly, Abby, Alexa, Mila, and.... Q: Who is last? A: Mia.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady, you don’t need to yodel about it!
I got a detention because I told an emo kid to "hang in there."
What animal jumps the highest?
An emo kid, some of them are still up there.
I was playing Fortnite with a kid, then I heard their emo sister in the background, and it sounded like they were playing Fortnite, too, with the pistol shot and all.
Random: What are your hobbies?
Me: Bullying kids in WhatsApp groups 💀
Why was the emo kid thrown out of the amusement park?
He kept cutting in line.
I hate adopted kids. They are ugly and stupid, lmao.
I was at the park the other day and sat down on the bench next to a mum and her daughter, and she asked which one was my kid, and I said I haven't decided yet.
Sorry for this Pick Up Line.
Are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11, so let me put my plane in and let kids fall out.
What is an emo kid's favorite game?
Hangman.
There was a little kid crying in the park today. I asked him where his parents were. Now I realize, man, I love my job.
A man has the power to grant anyone a wish they want.
A kid comes up and says, "I want to be like Batman!"
The man smiles and grants his wish. The child goes home and finds that he is now an orphan.
Do emo kids get jealous of their phone when it dies?
What did the tree say to the kid with the rope?
Nothing, he was hanging.
Me vs. the emo kid: we go to high-five a tree. I get a high five; the emo kid is left hanging.
What does Michael Jackson and maths have in common? They're both hard for kids.