Just Eat jokes

What do lesbians cook for dinner?

They don't, they just eat out.

These two cannibals are sitting by the campfire having dinner. One says, "I can't stand my mother-in-law." The other says, "So, just eat the potatoes."

Why did the Twin Towers order from Just Eat?

They wanted some plane fries.

When you can’t have Chinese food because you don’t have any pets,

just eat African food, you have plenty of neighbors!

Hey paps, BONE-appetit!

(Just eat your spaguetti.)

Chuck Norris doesn't need protein bars. He just eats his own shit.

(True story)

One day Sally's mom said, "I can just eat you up!" And Sally says, "No, you can't!" Then the mom asks why and Sally says, "Because I'm a beaner, and we don't taste good."

Trump: Caillou, can you please stop whining? That squirrel didn’t just eat our pizza, he also ditched your dad, and he’s your stepdad now.

Caillou: Why I’m bald, Trumpy?

Trump: I don’t know, but what I do know is that you’re a massive shit stain.

I once ate a watch. It was time consuming.

They always say you are what you eat! So I’d be nothing. That sounds about right.

I ate too many temmie flakes... I guess I got a TEMMIE ACHE!!!!

When I was a boy, I had a disease that required me to eat dirt three times a day in order to survive... It's a good thing my older brother told me about it.

Billy: *spits out food*

Mom: BILLY! We swallow what we have in our mouths.

Dad: *looks at mom*

Mom: Shut up.

If you get it, you get it.