Insult

Insult jokes

Comeback

  • An ugly, arrogant woman walked into a store with her 2 kids, yelling at them.

    The store clerk pleasantly said, "Good morning ma'am and welcome. Nice children, are they twins?"

    The ugly woman stopped yelling and said, "Hell no they are not, one is 9 and the other is 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just bloody stupid?"

    The clerk replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid ma'am, I just can't believe someone would screw you twice."

  • 3
  • Whale

  • "You momo joso fat, she went in the ocean and the whales came up to her and started singing, ""We Are Family"" even though you are father than me."

    Height

  • I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.

    And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."

  • 1
  • Yo mama

  • Holy shit there's so many yo mama jokes. Here's mine: Yo mama so skinny she used a cheerio as a hula hoop.

    Yo mama so fat that she made a plane unstable and crashed it into the Twin Towers.

    Yo mama so old that she has Jesus's autograph.

    Yo mama so ugly that not even makeup can save her.

    Yo mama so dumb that she thought Rocket League was a competition between kids in wheelchairs.

  • 5
  • Yo mama

  • - Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a yellow dress, people yell "Taxi!"

    - Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to climb Mountain Dew.

    - Yo mama is so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.

    - Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King when he was still a prince.

    - Yo mama is so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.

  • 3