Indians jokes
What do you do in India when you need to tell the time but don't have the money for a watch?
You bob your head from side to side like a metronome.
What kind of car does an Indian person drive? A Pri-yas.
What do you call a group of Indians that eat curry all the time?
The Munch Bunch.
What happens to an Indian's doorbell when you ring it?
A ring-a-ding-a-ding.
Why don’t Indians play soccer?
Because every time they’re at the corner, they build a store.
What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels?
Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.
What did the Indian say when the pizza was delivered to him?
"Hey! Who puked on the frybread?"
Why do Indians like basketball?
Because Steph Curry plays it.
What sound does an Indian make when you're trying to fuck it? ieieieie.
You know you have weird Indian parents when you can hear them canilingus each other.
What operating system do Indian scammers use?
"Window licker XP."
What's an Indian's favorite drug?
Beans.
Vegan is actually an old Indian word for "bad hunter."
How do you know someone from India is a good sniper?
They have a dot in the middle of the head.
Indian? Did or feather?
An Indian has a seat between two Pakistani's on board an airplane.
It's quite obvious to each of the three men where they are from. The Indian asks, "Pardon me gentleman, you wouldn't mind me sitting between you, do you? This is my seat, after all."
The Pakistanis look at each other, and then look back at him. One of them smiles and says, "Not at all! After all, Pakistanis and Indians are brothers! Are we not?"
The Indian is delighted at how warm and friendly they are, and he takes his seat. Shortly the plane takes off and the three guys are just chilling until the Indian says, "You know it's going to be a long ride and I am getting thirsty. Brothers, can I get any of you like a drink?" Then one of them says, "Yes brother, I would like a Coke!"
The Indian slips off his shoes and walks barefoot to where the stewardess is at, and when the Indian is out of view, one of the Pakistanis spits into his shoe. The Indian comes back and gives him a Coke.
Then the other Pakistani says, "You know what brother? I would also like a Coke too!" The Indian happily obliges, and as soon as he is out of view, he also spits in his shoe before the Indian gives him a Coke.
Finally, the Indian slips on his shoes and suddenly realizes how wet they are. He shakes his head and says, "Brothers! Why must we do this to each other, spitting in each other's shoes and peeing in each other's Cokes?"
Two Native Americans
Unwittingly walk into a gay bar and sit down to order a pitcher of beer. As they're sitting there sucking back on their ale, a gay guy walks up and says, "How would you boys like a blow job?"
The one Indian stands up and decks the guy, knocking him unconscious. He then sits back down and finishes his beer.
His buddy looks over and says, "Hey Joe, what did you do that for?"
Joe replies, "Not sure but it was something about getting a job!"
What do u call a pretty Indian girl?
Bomb bae.
All the children ate at the Indian restaurant, except for Simon, because he was eaten by the restaurant owner.
What's Penaldo's least favorite food?
Indian Murukku, because it reminds him of Morocco! 🤣🤣🤣