In common jokes
What did Hitler and Usain Bolt have in common?
They both finished the races.
What do TVs and girls have in common?
They both show you stuff when you turn them on!
I like when people say they hate me because we have something in common. <3
What do a fat chick and a moped have in common? They’re both fun to ride until your friends find out.
What do Michael Jackson and math have in common? They are both hard for kids.
What's the one thing me and the New Year's ball have in common?
It's not gonna be the only thing falling 50 stories this New Year's.
What does a depressed person and a fashion enthusiast have in common?
They both have something hanging in their closet.
What does a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus have in common? They're both thinking; "Oh sh*t, my mom's gonna kill me!"
What do 9/11 and Covid-19 both have in common?
Asians caused them both!
Why don't a gun and an orphan have anything in common? The gun is actually useful.
What do iPhones and the Titanic have in common?
There's no Jack!
What do Asians and John Cena have in common? You can't see me!
What do strippers and peanut butter have in common? They both spread for bread.
What does Michael Jackson and tuna fish have in common?
They both come in small can.
What do orphans have in common with stray dogs?
Nothing, they are both orphans.
What do Call of Duty and Al-Qaeda goals have in common?
You’ve got to get more than one down.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
What does Kobe and the Twin Towers have in common?
The pilots just couldn't stick the landing.
Wow, that was explosive!
Man, I'm on fire 🔥 today!
What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common?
They both like to dump their loads into little kids.
What does a pulse and an orgasm have in common? I don't care if she has one.