If jokes

A professor was talking about the American dream. Then, he asked the German exchange student if there was a German dream, to which the student replies, "We did, but no one liked it."

  • 2
  • Real quick, I'm autistic, and if anyone asks, I absolutely love some of these jokes. XD I found this while doing some research for a paper.

    When you ask your sister if she wanna smash, but then she grabs the Switch.

    So this guy named Andrew Furda was my boyfriend for like a half a week, so five days. Then bam, I cut my hair. He only liked me for my looks, and I hoped he regrets it because it is WAR, so if you see this, you're going down, Andrew!

    Doctor: I'm sorry, but you still have 10 seconds left.

    Man: What?! What about my family?! My son is still missing! I can't just leave like that!

    Doctor: Don't worry sir, I told your family.

    Man: That's... great... if they found my son, tell them that I love him more than anything and I couldn't keep that promise.

    The doctor watches the man closing his eyes while tears fell down from his eyes.

    Doctor: I will... dad...

    Tq for reading my crappy joke.

    Boi, you can't be talking because if someone punched you in the face, you will be the one to apologize.

    Boi, you can't be talking because if someone punched you in the face, you will be the one to apologize.

    I was 11 or 12 at the time.

    Guy (passing me): "How are you doing?" Me, an autist: "Pretty bad honestly." Guy (continued walking past me) Me: ...

    If you didn’t know, “what’s up” and “how are you doing” are phatic expressions in the United States, meaning that they’re said as greetings even though they literally mean something else.

  • 6
  • A guy walks up to me in the street and asks if you have to include the name of an animal in every sentence. I said only if it's relephant.

    He says what about vegetables. I said not nesecelery.