HI jokes

A son asked his mom: "Why are the lines in the LGBTQ community flag straight?"

Hi, I'm Yeff.

Why is Ronan's forehead the size of Jupiter? Because he dropped the TV on his forehead. It also had rings.

Why is Jupiter's ring stuck in orbit? Because Ronan's forehead kept it stuck in orbit.

Snails are like sperm, slow and sloppy.

One day, Little Johnny needs to use the bathroom. His mom is in there, so he went in to use it and asked his mom, "What is that between your legs?"

His mom told him that is her bush. Then the next day the same thing happened, but with his dad. He asked his dad, "What is that between his legs?" He said, "My snake."

The same thing happened one more time, except with his grandmother. Little Johnny asked grandma what is on her chest. She said, "My headlights."

One night, Little Johnny caught his parents doing something naughty. Then he said, "Grandma, grandma, turn on your headlights! Daddy's snake is trying to get into mommy's bush!"

Why did the chicken cross to the U.S. from Mexico?

To get to the U.S., but he had to show his papers first.

What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?

Gloves!

JK, he hasn't opened it yet.

What did the bounty hunter call his favorite dog?

His Boba Pet.

So this guy thought he was funny by pissing on the floor and not in the urinal.

Later on, I guess some kid ran into the bathroom because, well, he probably had to go, but yeah, he slipped and fell and hit his head on the urinal, so all in all it was a pretty good prank on his part.

What’s Steven Hawking's fav[orite] food?

WiFi chips or his shoulder?

What’s one thing smarter than Stephen Hawking? His computer.

Stephen Hawking died because he turned off his VPN.

The point of war is not to die for your country, but to make the fresh recruit on the enemy's side die for his.

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

Because his son wanted to charge their phone, so they unplugged him.

Why did he die so soon? Oh, I know, he forgot to plug in his charger!

A man walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender asks what he wants. The man says, "I would like one beer for me and one for the road."

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

His Windows update wasn't available.

Why did the idiot post so many 9/11 jokes?

Answer: Because his mom is a whore!

Hi, I'm Coby Bayley.

Why did the rapper bring a clock to the stage?

To keep track of his rhyme time.

Only Dick Rapeboat got is his rhyming dictionary.