HI jokes

How do you turn a straight guy into a gay guy? Well... for starters, you grab that ass of his, drag him into the bathroom, and tell him to suck my long, big pineapple, and thus you have yourself one straight guy converted into a dick-sucking machine.

How do you turn a hairy man into a feminist?

Just take out his brain and there you go!

Yo mama so fat that when she farted, Big Shaq took off his jacket.

A magic genie tells Tom, "I can make anything of yours disappear!"

Tom raises his mug and says, "Okay, get rid of my tea."

Genie: Poof!

Tom: It didn't work.

To Gwen and Freshfry: Hi Gwen and Freshfry, you have been so amazing to me and now to my sister. You are the people who I look up to. People are mean to us because I am adopted. Thank you for all of your support!

We have a teacher in school. His name is Haybrock, but he is gay, so we call him Gaybrock.

A dad is in a wheelchair and his daughter goes, "Don't step on a crack!"

I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dad's friend and I would take him home. He just curled up into a ball and started crying. Kidnapping must be easy.

Zion's so fat, when he walks, he breaks his mama's back.

What would a gay man do for free that a heterosexual woman that is a whore won't do for $50.00 for a heterosexual man?

Suck his balls.

How do you find out the price of an emo? You scan his barcode.

Why was Kobe a good father?

He took his daughter with him.

Little Johnny woke up at midnight on Christmas Eve to Santa with his pants down on top of his mom. He then said, "Ho ho OH YEAH!!!"

What did the O say to the O? "O hi O!" (Ohio)

A boy went to a genie and said, "I want to be like Batman."

He went home, his parents weren't there.

His hairline doing the moonwalk. Oh, I forgot, he doesn’t even have a hairline.

My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sister's knickers the other day. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she was wearing them at the time. It made the rest of the funeral so awkward.

Trump really fractured the US with his 1/6 insurrection...

Why did the Vampire put his son up for adoption?

He thought his son sucked!

Why did Jeffrey eat all the ice cream in one sitting?

To make room in the freezer for his special meat.