Hawking jokes
What was Stephen Hawking's least favorite invention? The walkie-talkie.
Person 1: Wasn’t Stephen Hawking on X Factor?
Person 2: No, why would he be on X Factor?
Person 1: For dancing.
How does Stephen Hawking have sex?
Enter, backspace. Enter, backspace.
There are days I feel really bad for my Wife. She has to feed me in the same place I take a dump.
She really hates it when I spit my food back out.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
......
Stephen Hawking couldn't drink anything.
He'd break if he did.
Have you ever stepped in Stephen Hawking's house?
Neither has he.
Why is Stephen Hawking so square headed? Because he forgot to shut Minecraft down!
How were Stephen Hawking's best mates, Siri and Google?
I wanna see Stephen Hawking on nitrous.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a tap?
The tap can run.
Stephen Hawking trying to climb the stairway to heaven.
Why haven't they just tried turning Stephen Hawking on and off?
Steven Hawking lost the Wi-Fi connection on March 14, 2018.
What was Stephen Hawking's pet?
A hawk.
What's the difference between Madlen Makan and Stephen Hawking?
Nothing, they're both dead.
What is Hawking's number one song? The Beach Boys: "I Get Around."
Steven Hawking's Sesh Cave, entry 50p, guaranteed Budweiser and ecstasy. Maybe a gram of heroin. You'll most likely see a mental 90-year-old guy absolutely going mental on the dance floor with a Stella in one hand and another on his crotch.
What can you tell [is] the difference between Stephen Hawking and a carrot?
Nothing.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost WiFi connection.