Yo mama so fat her weight is angry grandpa's subscriber count
My grandpa personally killed 3 German pilots. He was the worst mechanic Luftwaffe had.
my grandpas last words were, why is there a body in my kitchen.
no witnessess
Grandpa's last words,why do you have a chain saw
I went to a sleepover at my best friend's house. He lives with his grandpa and little brother, his mom and dad. His little brother likes to run around the house naked sometimes. I cant help but notice his grandpa always looks up when he does.
A mom gave her son "the talk". her son replies "wait so there really isn't candy involved? Guess Grandpa lied.
I want to die in my sleep, like grandpa did, not screaming and crying like the people on the bus he drove.
This kid was going to sleep and h said night mum night dad and night gramma and bye grandpa next morning grandpa died and the next night he said night dad night mum night grandma and gramma died the next morning and the next night he said night mum bye dad and they heard the postman died bc he was the dad lol
my grandfather has the heart of a lion!!🦁
in a jar on his desk along with a lifetime ban from the zoo.....
One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Little Johnny asked, "Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?" His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" "No", said Little Johnny. His grandpa replied, "Then you're not old enough." The next day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. He asked, "Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?" His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" "No" said Little Johhny. "Then you're not old enough." his grandpa replied. The next day, Little Johnny was eating cookies. His grandpa asked, "Can I have some of your cookies?" Little Johnny replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" His grandpa replied, "It most certainly can!" Little Johnny replied, "Then go fuck yourself
Child- Goodnight Mommy. Goodnight Daddy. Goodnight Grandma. Goodbye Grandpa! Dad- Wait, why are you saying that? Child- I just felt like it The next day, the Grandpa is dead Dad- That's just a VERY scary coincidence. Child- Goodnight Mommy. Goodnight Daddy. Goodbye Grandma. Dad- Wait, why are you saying that? Child- I just felt like it. The next day, the Grandma is dead. Dad- That's just a VERY scary coincidence. Child- Goodnight Mommy, Goodbye Daddy! Dad- Oh no. If I survive until tommorow, everything will be okay! Survives until tmmrow Dad- Whew! That was nice! *Goes to house* Mom- Honey! I was so worried about you! The mailman just dropped dead on our porch! (If you don't get it, the mailman is the biological father)
Knock knock Who is there Mother Mother who Fuck of bichon I'm your mother
What sound does a nut make when it sneezes? Cashew
ya i have a hydro flask h- My y- Grandpa d- Sticks r- His o- Cock f- Up l- My a- Ass s- k-
At school, bobby boy's classmate tells him some depressing stuff. Later that day, bobby comes home crying and his mom greets him at the door with "why are you crying". Bobby says "someone said my grandpa died, but when did he die". His mom looks him straight in the eye and says "depends, which one are you referring to?"
My grandad killed Hitler. He was such a great man
Little Johnny walks in on his grandfather smoking a cigar. “May I smoke a cigar?” Asks Johnny.
The grandpa replies “Well, does your dick touch your asshole?”
Johnny replied “No.” and left the room.
The next day Johnny sees his Grandpa getting into a car.
“Can I drive the car?” Asks Johnny.
“Does your dick touch your asshole?”
“No.”
The day after that, Granpa sees Johnny about to eat a cookie.
“Johnny, may I have some of your cookie?” Asked the grandpa.
“Does your dick touch your asshole, grandpa?”
“Yep.”
“Then go fuck yourself, this is my cookie.”
I’ll never forget my grandpas last words to me...
“Are you still holding the ladder??”
When you’re walking through the garden section at Walmart and you hear your grandpa screaming “They’re in the fucking trees!”
I still to this day remember my grandpa's last words.
"IM ALLERGIC TO FUCKING CATS,!"
