Someone asked me if I was a good sleeper. I told them I'm so good that I can do it with my eyes closed.
Good Will Jokes
Friend: Hey, did you catch that game last night? I did, it was so good! After that I went to Kane’s, because Kane's is amazing! What did you do this weekend? I did-
Me: Dude, are you the Terms and Conditions? Because I don’t give a fuck about what you say.
Hey John, how are you going?
Helium, yeah good, what about you?
(Hey Liam)
I did a walk today, but it was so much better, and a walk home. I had dinner. Night was good fun at home. Night was good night. I was a little off, but you were so fun to be a night.
I did have a good night, and I did a good night, and I had fun, and I had to.
My friend told me she had a good joke and it beat all mine. I said, "Haha, that is funny!"
What goes in and comes out and makes you feel good but isn't sexual?
(Insulin)
Boss: Have a good day.
Me: *goes home*
What is a good night sleep? I love it when you walk home and walk home from school and walk home and walk home from home and walk home and get a good night walk and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from...
I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.
And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."
I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.
This is how to die soft 101.
Yo bro, you good? You need a hug?
5 Cobra Kai Facts:
1: Johnny = Daniel
2: Miguel > Robby
3: Miyagi Do = Eagle Fang
4: Chozen and Daniel > Kreese and Silver
5: Tory is actually a good person.
Why don't humans eat raw meat? Because they use technology to cry about raw meat is good. Go and leave, bro, I'm going to eat sushi.
What is one good thing about child molesters?
They drive slow past schools.
Global warming will kill every single person on this planet.
It's a good thing I'm married.
A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."
"Then how about Karaoke?"
To which he replied, "I have two left throats."
My mom said that being straight is good, but if you're straight, how do you walk? So I decided to be gay.
What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?
Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.
The one good thing about an orphan is that they don't get roasted with a "yo mama" joke.
