Glue jokes
It's amazing how many things rhyme with blue.
Blue, sue, stew, poo, screw, new, boo, do, rue, glue, you, to, too, flew, you, goo, zoo, two, moo, woo, ooh, blew...
A salesman rings the doorbell and Little Johnny answers. Salesman: “Can I see your dad?” Johnny: “No, he’s in the shower.” Salesman: “What about your mother? Can I see her?” Johnny: “Nope. She’s in the shower, too.” Salesman: “Do you think they’ll be out soon?” Johnny: “Doubt it. When my dad asked me for the Vaseline, I gave him super glue instead.”
What is white and sticky?
Glue.
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.
Let’s stick together!
What do you call a cat 🐈 that is glued down? A big cluck.
What do you call a train that carries glue?
A glue-glue train!
Someone eats glue and tells the other, "Sorry, can't stick around!"
Looks like he got stuck in a sticky situation.
How do you confuse Helen Keller? You rearrange the furniture and glue doorknobs to the walls.
What is the difference between tuna, a piano, and glue? You can tuna a piano, but you cannot piano a tuna.
(The person you ask should say what about the glue.) Response: I knew you would get stuck there.
What does a tuna, piano, and a tub of glue have in common?
You can tune a piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
But what about the glue? said Bob I. I knew you would get stuck on that!
Some people call them glue sticks, but they're blue sticks.
Guy 1: "Tell me a bad pun."
Guy 2: "Alright. What's the difference between a tuna fish, a piano, and a tube of glue?"
Guy 1: "Ok, that last one was random as heck. What is the difference?"
Guy 2: "You can tuna a piano, but you can't piano a tuna."
Guy 1: "Ok, where does the glue come in?"
Guy 2: "Ah, I knew you'd get stuck on that."
What is brown and extremely sticky?
A stick.
A happy mother: "Why is your sister so quiet?! And how did you get super glue stuck on your penis?!"
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.
Glue is sticky.
hahahahahhhahaha
I put glue in a man :)
Yo momma so fat, she glues together rags as clothes.