Gluing jokes
Inside a room full of squares, buckets, and tints, there are two inspectors. One is called Mr. Right, the other one is called Mr. Wrong. Because of their names, the first one is trusted more than the second one.
Mr. Wrong eventually got tired of that and worked on a plan for how more people could trust him. He took a jigsaw and he started to cut into his brain and sawed away half of his brain. It was still working.
Then he took a loaf of toast, cut it into half and glued it on his head, and then he made a strawberry cream and sprayed it on the toast. Because people couldn't recognize him as "Mr. Wrong," he was able to solve more cases.
What do you call a cat 🐈 that is glued down? A big cluck.
Someone glued my deck of cards together. I don't know how to deal with it.
Fred and Mary got married, but can't afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred's parent's home for their first night together.
In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast.
As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet.
She replies, "No".
Johnny asks, "Do you know what I think?"
His mom replies, "I don't want to hear what you think! Just go to school."
Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?"
She replies, "No."
Johnny says, "Do you know what I think?"
His mom replies, "Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school."
After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?"
His mom says "No."
He asks, "Do you know what I think?"
His Mom replies, "Ok, do tell me what you think?"
He says: "Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think I gave him my airplane glue."
Some people call them glue sticks, but they're blue sticks.
I have good faith in the glue police. They usually stick to their word.
I put glue in a man :)
Glue is sticky.
hahahahahhhahaha
What is burned dark and glued to the wall?
A bad electrician.
How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.
Community talk
“Bye bye friends, I’ll be back“ Well I’m back! Sorta. I’m not leaving tho so don’t get your dick in a twist lmao but I am going to be on less, sorta like what Ethan does. I will go back to being on normally down the line but for now I definitely need to shorten the amount of time I’m on here. I’ve been slacking in school to be on here and I need to get my priories in order. But I can’t leave fully because I am glued to this site and I love you guys(well most of you) no homo. Thank you for coming to my Ded talk.