I can tell you used to be friends with your hairline, cuz it goes way back.
Friends Jokes
Why are friends a lot like snow?
If you pee on them, they disappear.
My "friend" has dyslexia.
All my friends live in a forest. It's called Aokigahara.
Me: *Calls friend* "Dude, I just fell off a 50-foot ladder!"
Friend: "Bro, you ok?!"
Me: "Yeah, lucky I only fell off the first step!"
Guys, add me as a friend in Roblox. I'm hawaiilover973 :D
Attention, everyone: I will be leaving this website. Thank you everybody who has been nice to me. Maybe I’ll come back in the future, but for now: Goodbye.
To Mr. Nice Guy, you are nice, sweet, and caring! I am so grateful to be your friend!
Friend: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Friend: Your life.
Me: Ahhh, I wish!
*jumps off building*
My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."
My friend Harry.
Me and my suicidal friend are close, so I took him to the mall to treat him.
We bought snacks, a new controller for his Xbox, and LED lights for his room to hopefully brighten his mood. After we scanned the last item, the machine beeped by itself.
My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?
Why can't orphans have friends?
They will stay together.
I was having a party in my basement, and my friend asked me what that bag covered in blood was for. I said, "Oh, that's the bag I catch the children with to torture them in this basement."
Damn! Really stole my friend's glasses. Well, now they're blind, but not really, they're dead.
I have some black friends who hate it when I say the N-word around them, so I got a pet monkey.
Why can't fat kids play poker?
They eat all the chips.
POV: When the orphan kid goes to church and they have to swear on something.
The kid: "I swear on my... friends. Oh wait, I don't have any."
A man is telling his story to someone. "My friends always said that they would kill me if I wore Gucci or Supreme. On April 1st, I wore both and conversed with them."
"Interesting."
"That's the story of how I got to the morgue," he says to The Gatekeeper of Heaven.
