Me: I have the body of a 28 year old.
Her: Prove it.
Me: (opens freezer)
I locked Terri Schiavo in the freezer.
Hey, I thought that's where you were supposed to put vegetables!
What's the difference between a baby and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't scream when I put my meat in it.
I like my vegetables like I like my women: forgotten at the bottom of my freezer.
Why do they call Melania Trump the "Walk-In Freezer"?
Answer: Because it's where EVERYONE GOES to "Hang Their Meat!"
What is the similarity between women and freezers?
We like to put our meat in them.
What do you call a kid who's been kidnapped?
Well, her name's Sally, so I guess... Sally. My main concern is getting her out of the freezer.
"Guess what my wife left in the freezer?"
"Her miscarriage."
