First Time

First Time jokes

Guy

    • A guy goes ice fishing for the very first time. All of a sudden, he hears a voice. “There are no fish under the ice!”

    He ignores it and moves to another area, cuts a hole, and tosses his line in. Again, he hears the booming voice: “There are no fish under the ice!”

    He nervously looks up and asks, “Lord? Is that you?”

    “No, this is the rink manager!”

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    • Day

    • One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life.

    Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny what was happening.

    Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"

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    • Song

    • Radiohead had to remake "Fake Plastic Trees" after encountering Carrie Underwood in real life for the first time.

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    • Sex

    • What does your first football game and your first time having sex have in common?

    You were bloody and battered but at least your dad came.

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    • First Time memes

    Orphan

    • An orphan entered the high school for the first time. He has no knowledge of the school. He went to the secretary and asked where he shall go. The secretary then gave the orphan a schedule and said to the orphan, “Where is homeroom?” The secretary then asked which homeroom number he was assigned, and he said "1." The orphan then started to weep and said that his parents died right as he stole his first base in baseball.

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    • Guy

    • So this guy is talking to his buddy about his flying lessons. "My first time in the air, my instructor informed me that he was an 8th degree black belt and homosexual, and if I don't succumb to his sexual advances I would have to jump out of the plane," and his buddy says, "Well, did you jump?" The guy says, "Yeah, a little at first."

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    • Class

    • A 6-year-old told the class the first time she got AIDS. The teacher listened. She said she scraped her knee. The girl was sent to an asylum. When she got out, she was 20. She had AIDS.

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    • Girl

    • A happy little girl was running on the grass. She saw two gay guys kissing in a blank space, and she started crying. The two gay guys heard her crying, and then they asked her: "Why are you crying?" The little girl answered: "This is the first time I see an unnatural nature."

    😂😂😂😂

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    • Hairline

    • This boy said, "Get your hairline straight." I said, "Girls don't have a hairline. How about you go to the barber shop and let your barber do your hair 10 times worse than he did the first time."

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    • COVID-19

    • R. Kelly contracted COVID-19 recently. He was quoted as saying it was the first time he caught a case of anything over 18 in years.

    Asian

    • If you're ever bored, try scaring the sh*t out of an Asian to see their eyes open for the first time.

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    • Boy

    • A young orphan boy goes to school for the first time. A bigger boy comes and punches him. He says, "What are you gonna do, cry to your mommy?" The boy cries.

    Next morning, he wakes up and comes to school. The same thing happens, but the older boy brings his friends. This time, after he says, "You gonna tell your mom?", the little boy says, "Yes, I will tell them that there is company coming over."

    Sex

    • My friend said having sex is a lot like your first football game.

    You're bloody and bruised, but at least your dad was there.

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