There were once three brothers, Shit, Shut up and Manners. One day Shit got hit by a car. Shut up went to find help at the local police station whilst Manners tried to help Shit. When Shut up got to the police station he says "my brother has just been hit by a car." The policeman replied with "OK then first I need to know your name." "Shut up" "No, I need to know your name." "Shut up." "Excuse me but where are your manners." "Round the corner picking up shit."
I tried making an orphan baseball team. It sucked because they couldn’t find home plate
How did Billy find out he was in a minefield?
He saw his dads corpse holding a jug of milk.
Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home ? He lost the whey!😅
Alright kids! Find a good places to stop! Then, out of the blue, Billy died. But hey, he went to a better place.
Disney just released a new film about a poor kid with cancer. It’s called Finding Chemo.
How are tinder and orphans alike?
You swipe left till you find the one you like
I went to find someone to fuck in the streets for money, and I found a prostitute but then she raped me. After she said it was amazing and instead let me push
Today i find out that my cat got hit by a car accident, wellp i guess im gonna play ninja fruits on my hands again, Its not like anyone will notice.
What turns a girl on more than having sex with her
When she finds out that you have a vibrator too
When you find out your wife had a miscarriage
So you start singing it’s the best day ever
You should go soul searching maybe you'll find one
What store can an orphan never find?
Home Depot
Why did the orphan go to the playground? To see if it could find it's parents
Q: what’s worst fingerbanging your sister? A: finding your dads wedding ring
Why is orphans bad at hide and seek ? Because they can’t find there parents
A Catholic priest finds a young boy crying at the top of a cliff.
“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
The boy points down. “Mummy and Daddy were in the car and it went over the edge”.
The priest can see the flaming wreck below. He looks around and sees no one else is about and starts to unbutton his belt
“It’s really not your day, is it?”
This site is darker than fingering your sister and finding your dad's wedding ring.
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, "mommy mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, daddy came in with the lady next door and they started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off daddy's clothes and daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of daddy and started...". The mother cuts him off and says "just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me." Couple hours later the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face shouting "I'm leaving you... Go ahead Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier." Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. "Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door and you both started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off your clothes and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing mom did with uncle joe last summer."
why was my mate in mission impossible because he couldn't find his dad
