Fat jokes

What is stuck between a doorway?

Rebel Wilson.

Yo mama is so fat that a whole forest grew on her, but it was sad because she really smells, so the forest died.

Yo mama so fat and old, she lifted her boob to wash under it, and a pilgrim fell from under it.

I suck his dick with a smile for hours at a time.

Stare at his nutsack while I hold back my cum tonight.

And when he ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle." (And when they ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle.")

But the fact is I can never get off of his fat dick. And all that they can ask is (Ask is, ask is) "I just wanna smack it" (I just wanna smack it)

Here's what the fact is He can put my asshole in a casket (Yuh, yuh, yuh) Asshole in a casket

So you can see I'm cummin' But you won't see me nut. And I'll just keep on suckin', I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

And if he sucks my glizzy I will become dizzy But it keeps us busy, I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

I've been twerking for boys for so long I've been flirting with boys for so long

My jaw's been hurting for so, so long it's real So long, it's real, so long, it's real

My "overweight" friend and I were talking at lunch.

Overweight friend: Man, why you so ugly, dude?

Me: *annoyed* Jason, when you stepped on the scale this morning, it asked for your weight, not your phone number.

Why was 10 afraid? Because he was 'tween 9 and 11.

Yo mama so fat when she walks the earth talks!

LMAO

Yo mama so fat, Dora can't explore her.

Sans: Why did the skeleton go to the party?

Papyrus: Why?

Sans: 'Cause he was too fat and ugly!

Papyrus: AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHA LOLOL,OLOLOL

Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.

Your mom is fat.

Oooo, roasted!

Why did God create gay men? So fat girls could dance.

"I can lose 10 ugly pounds anytime I want -- I'll just cut off my head!"

Do you use humor to make light of your emotional eating and your weight? Make jokes about overeating and being fat as a way of getting along with other people? I was a Grand Champion at it.

Your mamma is so fat that even a North Korean missile would have competition.

Your mama's so fat that when she went to space, there was no space left.

Your mama's so fat, she needed NASA to make her ID card!

Roses are red. Sunflowers are yellow.

Your mom is so fat she looks like a marshmallow.

Your mom's so fat, she don't need to be worldwide, she already is.

Yo mama so fat, when she made a joke, only one person laughed at it: the pavement. It was absolutely cracking up!

Yo mama so fat, NASA has a satellite orbiting around her.