Family jokes
Why can't an orphan use an Apple iPad?
Because it can't find the home button...
Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, “Mommy, can little girls have babies?”
“No,” said his mom, “Of course not.”
Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, “It’s okay! We can play that game!”
You know what orphans and I have in common? Our dads both left for the milk.
Yo momma so fat!
When you look exactly like your dead cousin and everybody thinks she faked her death.
FUCKING MENT
One day this kid says to his dad, "Dad, they bully me at school."
His dad asks why, and the kid says, "They bully me because I got no hands."
Then his dad says, "Who would do such a thing like that? I want to know who they are. Point at them!"
What do emo kids have in common with orphans?
They both depress'd on the inside.
Why do orphans hate the letter F?
Because the F stands for the family that didn't want them.
Yo mama so ugly, she made everybody's face fall off.
Why didn't the opening photo actually have a pic of sex on it? I have always wanted to see porn, too bad I have parents and a school Chromebook.
Ur adopted.
I told some orphan that you can see your family, but I meant Spider-Man: Homecoming...
Yo momma so ugly, your grandma wanted to name her Abomination, but the registries agent changed it.
My mom said she would miss me if I committed suicide, so we made it double.
Why did the orphan get 1 mark out of 6 from a project yesterday? Because it was a family tree project.
Your mom is so fat, when she swam in the sea, Wales came up to her and said, "We are family, even now you’re fatter than me."
When you ask an orphan to come over:
Kid: "Do you want to come over to my house?"
Orphan: "Yeah, sure."
Kid: "Ok, ask your parents—oh wait."
Why can't orphans play soccer? Because they can't practice with their dad.
Why do dads take time to get?
Milk?
Why can't orphans use iPhones?
They can't find the home button.