Family jokes
Why do orphans hate geometry? Cuz it reminds them that their parents are poley-gone.
My grandad broke his legs.
To cheer him up, I bought him a Walkman.
Yo, sis, come here.
Sis: What?
Me: Oh, sorry, you doing school?
Sis: Yup.
Me: Can I go?
Sis: No way, you're going to hug me.
Me: I love you.
An orphan asked if they could move into my house yesterday. I said, "Don't you have a family?"
I will never forget my grandfather's last words:
"Can you hold the ladder correctly, damn it!"
Why can't orphans play video games?
Because they can't access the home screen.
Why does the orphan do robberies?
Because he wants to be wanted.
What do you call an orphanage?
A parent-less shelter/homeless shelter.
Why do orphans commit crimes?
To be wanted.
Why do orphans play GTA?
'Cause they're actually wanted.
What does my family and the Twin Towers have in common? We both played Jenga.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One's actually picked.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because it can't find home!
What show do orphans never watch?
"Fuller House."
What is an orphan's favorite movie?
Daddy's Home.
Why do orphans pray to God?
So they have someone to call father.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't make it home.
I broke up with my RBLX gf, and I heard my uncle crying in the other room.
So, my son is into astronomy, and he asked how stars die. I said, "Usually overdose."