Family jokes
Why do orphans like the game Adopt Me? Because they've never been adopted in their life.
What do you tell twins that are in love with each other?
Go fuck yourselves!
What do you tell twins who are in love with each other?
Go fuck yourself!
Why am I so fat? When I was younger my mother said I should be the bigger person.
What did the orphan say to his stepmom?
"I need help."
In Alabama... How do you know your sister is having periods? Your dad's penis tastes like blood.
What’s an orphan's favorite movie?
Home Alone.
A girl with no arms and one leg goes to her mother and asks: "Mom, next year for the carnival, can I dress up as a princess?"
The mother replies: "Why? Didn't you like the ice lolly dress from last year?"
Why does an orphan cry on Thanksgiving?
Family gathering.
Yo mama so fat...
My mom told me to unplug all the electronics, so I unplugged my grandma's life support.
Mom, Mom, I'm holding my little brother's hand.
Little Johnny, good! But he's not "bien" yet.
I know this isn't the real chicken wing song, but my version...
"Chicken wing, chicken wing, I want your mommy. Slap her with my hairy salami while she's still yawning."
Make your own chicken wing song and put it in the comments... :)
Why do orphans want parents? Because they don't want to be left out.
Mom!
Everybody is mad because that guy from Alberta punched a girl in a wheelchair.
I think he was upset because he found out his sister was cheating on him.
Why do all orphans have iPhone 10-12?
They don't have a home button.
What did the momma grape say to the pappa grape?
"Raisin' our kids is usually pretty fun, but sometimes they get sunburn and I have to take them to the doctor for dry skin."
Why did Billy fall off his bike?
Because his dad threw a chair at him.
Why can’t orphans have sex, my friends? Why? They have none to call daddy.