What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?
Eminem-o the Great.
Eminem Jokes
Did you hear about the story of the husband who told his wife she’d look sexier with her hair back?
Apparently, that’s not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.
A young man cracked a joke about dementia to his friend on the bus. The old man sitting next to him politely asked, “Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?”
He replied, “Yes, I cancer.” Then he cracked tumor.
EMINEM: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.
WebMD: Cancer.
Your mom is so fat that she thought Eminem is a candy.
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem.
I call it my trail mix.
"I had raped the game young, you can call it statutory." - Kanye West in 2009 (Forever with Drake, Eminem, and Lil Wayne)
What's the difference between Johnny Depp and Eminem? Eminem was never proven to beat his wife in court, but Johnny Depp was.
I make elevating music; you make elevator music.
Cause they about to taste my Morbius! I got that acrimonious odious Cause the bats are copious My blood flow is harmonious Bout to act felonious You know they hating us And we getting treasonous Woo when they get bit with the Morbius! I got that acrimonious odious Cause the bats are copious My blood flow is harmonious Bout to act felonious You know they hating us And we getting treasonous Woo when they get bit with the (Morbius) (Morbius) (Morbius) (Morbius) (Morbius) Morbius (His name is Dr. Michael Morbius)
Eminem: "He don't even know his own father." Orphans: Dang, wish I could listen to that. Eminem: At least you have a rap God to call father.
Q. What is Terri Schiavo's favorite Eminem song?
A. "Till I Collapse."
Bitch, I can make orange rhyme with banana.
BORNANA
What did Eminem call himself when he lost weight?
Slim Shady.
What if Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady, but couldn't stand up?
What did Eminem do when he couldn't get some of his mom's spaghetti?
Well, he didn't make it back to recovery this time...
I like to eat mom's spaghetti. Now try it with the NEWWWW VEGETTIIII, turn any vegetable into pasta!
What's white and rhymes with Dre? Eminem.
Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to eat Eminem. 🎤😎
Imagine Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady but could not stand up.
