Education jokes
Kid: Hey, what’s black and sneaky!
Social studies teacher: Harriet Tubman.
*School shooting happens*
Foreign exchange student: *Sobbing under desk*
American student: "First time?"
What do you call a creepy IT teacher?
A PDF file.
The teacher asks her class, "What is sex?" and Little Jonny stands up and says, "Sex is the temptation caused by the sensation when a boy sticks his location into a girl's destination. Did you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?" and the teacher fainted.
A teacher is doing an experiment about taste. She tells each student to line up so she can give them each a lifesaver, so they can tell her what flavor it is. She gives Suzy a pineapple one. Suzy tries it, says the flavor, and then goes and sits back down. That is the same for everyone, then it is Jhonny's turn. The teacher hands him a honey flavor one. Jhonny chews it for a while, then says,
"Teacher, I don't know what it is.". The teacher tries to give him a hint and says, "it's what your parents call each other when you are asleep". Immediately the boy behind Jhonny screams, "Spit it out Jhonny, it's an asshole!!!"
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of screaming children.
How did the Mexican girl get pregnant? Her teacher told her to do his essay.
I aced my poker test...
My teacher asked me to reflect on my work, so I got a mirror...
A caffeinated vampire goes to sleep in a coffin...
Do you get my puns? No, because you can't seem to get a grasp on how bad they are...
What did the author say when he got a correct answer? "I got it right!"
Where do Eagles send their children to study?
The Alpha birds.
Where does Santa send his children to study?
The Elf-phabets.
I made a pencil with two erasers. It was pointless.
Student asks teacher, "If I throw an apple and noodles, which one will fall first?"
Teacher replied, "I don't know."
Then student replied, "Noodles will fall first because noodles are fast foods!"
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of kids drowning.
We were discussing cows in a lesson. I asked my teacher why she was one.
What is yellow but can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
Teacher: "Stand up, class!"
She is sitting down.
Teacher: "Whoever stands up is stupid!"
Stephen Hawking is such a bad role model for our kids.
He only ever looks one way when crossing the street.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of kids.
People say I should be proud of my autism, but truth be told, I'm only in it for the help in class.