Dyslexic jokes

Did you hear about the dyslexic couple who were struggling to have sex? They kept doing the 96 positions.

Have you heard about the dyslexic devil worshipper?

He sold his soul to Santa.

Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.

That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman:

Did you hear about the dyslexic American police officer?

He shot a Ginger.

I used to have confidence issues because of my learning disability.

Until someone told me I put the sexy in dyslexia.

How many dyslexics does it take to change a lightbulb?

Steven.

Did you see the dyslexic kid try to write down “funeral?”

No? Shame, it was real fun.

"A dyslexic atheist lies awake at night wondering if there really is a Dog."

I thought a waitress said to me, "You're good looking." In fact, she was asking if I'd like some pudding.

A man walks into a bar and orders a cardigan and soke.

My middle name is Brian. I was so proud of being able to spell my full name till someone pointed out "Johnny Brain Walker" was incorrect.

When does a dyslexic person know when they've spelt their address wrong?

When it fails to turn up.

Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.

Once, asked if I played Scrabble, being dyslexic, I asked if it was the standard version or the deluxe dyslexic version.

I'm dyslexic. My sister was reading, "What's the book?" I asked. She showed me the cover. "You reading 'The Scared Bull'?" I asked. She started laughing. "No, 'The Sacred Bull'!"

My "friend" has dyslexia.

My friend asks me what does "idk" mean. I said, "I dion't know." My friend says, "You mean I don't know." I said, "That's what I said!"

Rory Burrows is dyslexic.

I can't spell. Spell. Pels. Slepe. Spell. Ellpas[a[dpa[pw[paew[pfopaojf[apdkoc[asndcsdokd Fkuc.

They told me I'd never be good at poetry.

But to date I have made 3 jugs and a vase, and they look lovely!