Drill jokes

Your mom was absolutely getting drilled by me on the living room floor last night.

Let's play carpenter. First, we'll get hammered, then I'll nail you.

My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.

How did the pornstar cut herself while using a drill?

She was too used to grabbing the tip.

What’s an emo kid's favorite wood working tool? A chop saw!

"I'd rather go through the pain of childbirth again than let you drill in my mouth," the woman told her dentist.

He replied, "Well, please make up your mind so I can adjust my chair."

Does it make me gay if I kiss your dad and he decides to drill my ass?

Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble?

He got caught playing with his Privates!

What's the difference between a drill and a priest?

Nothing, they both like screwing stuff!

I was out ice fishing and had no nibbles all morning.

About noon, this old guy comes out, drills a hole near mine, and starts catching fish as fast as he can bait the hook. I was getting frustrated without any luck, so I went over to ask him his secret. He said "Ymd ggt tm kppp tth yaems womg."

I said, "Excuse me, I didn't get that?" so he mumbles even louder, "Ymd ggt tm kppp tth yaems womg!" I shook my head and said, "I'm sorry, but I still didn't understand what you said."

Frustrated, the man spits out a wad out of his mouth and says, "YOU HAVE TO KEEP THE WORMS WARM!"

You know the drill, but do you know the hammer? Hah, nailed that one.

But I also think I screwed it up.

I live next to a kindergarten, and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it's me who has a drill around little children.

Hey girl, are you a drill sergeant, because you have my privates' attention.

I've been going to the dentist for a while now, I know the drill.

What type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole?

A pedophile.