Domestic Animal jokes

If a cat hits you with her tail, is it considered being pussy whipped?

Why did the goat have an abortion?

Because she already had too many kids!

A farmer walks into his bedroom with his wife in bed with a sheep under his arm and says, "This is the pig I'm fucking." She says, "You idiot, that's a sheep!" He says, "Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

Why did the baby cross the road?

Because it was stapled to a chicken.

I had a dog with an eating disorder.

He wouldn’t eat any of my homework.

That moment when you have to ask your Chinese neighbor if he's seen your cat.