Do jokes
What do you call an emo committing suicide while filming it?
America's Funniest Home Videos.
Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.
What do you call a cow that's beating his meat? Beef stroganoff!
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You follow the Fresh prints.
Why do some men call their testicles "bells"? Because it's next to their "ding-dong."
Memes
Stage 4 cancer is like a woman. You can’t beat it, but if you do, she’ll probably come back again.
How do you stop a baby from drowning?
-Lift up your foot.
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one-liners?
Because he can’t do stand-up.
🤔 What do gay men who are physically handicapped ♿ can do better than a man who is heteroflexible when 🤔 he has another man's 😍 😋 😜 😏 😳 😉 cock inside 😋 of his warm mouth 👄 👄 give a 👍 👍 good blowjob?
A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.
She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you."
She then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde."
The blonde then taped the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?"
Why did Trump decide to build the wall?
Because China built a wall and they do not have any Mexicans.
So, a daughter goes to her dad and says, "Daddy, can I borrow the car?" He then tells her, "You know what to do." So then she proceeds to suck him off, almost immediately pulls out in disgust, and says, "Ugh, tastes like shit." Her dad then said, "Damn, I forgot your brother took the car."
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap until their parents come home.
Q: What do you call it when four Mexicans drown in quicksand?
A: Cuatro Cinco.
What do you call a Chinese man in the heat?
Boi Ling.
How do you get 500 babies in a phone booth?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
A straw.
How do you know when your sister is on her period? When your dad's cock tastes of blood.
What do you call a fish with no eye?
Fsh.
Q: What do orphans call a family reunion?
A: Me time.
What do you call a Chinese millionaire?
Cha ching.