Dead Baby jokes

What do you call a dead baby?

Spawn killed.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a sandwich?

I don't put my dick in a sandwich before I eat it.

What’s the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby?

Dogs only lick peanut butter off private parts.

What is the difference between a dead baby and an orphan?

The dead baby happened on purpose while the orphan came out as an accident!

What's the difference between an apple and a dead baby?

I don't jizz on an apple before eating it.

Stop with the dead baby jokes. We're running out of babies.

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?

Well, it's not 8 because my basement is still dark.

What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?

Kentucky Fried Children!

What's it called when you eat those same babies?

Finger Lickin' Good!

What does a dead baby look like?

I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.

Write a different joke of onions and a dead baby.

I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.

So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.

One late night, my wife caught me standing in front of the freezer.

She asked me, "What are you doing?"

I replied, "I'm making a pink yeti."

She asked, "What does that mean?"

I said, "I left our kid in the freezer for a couple hours."

What's harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree?

My dick while I'm doing it.

What is worse than a dead baby in a trash can?

100 dead babies in a trash can.

What is worse than that?

There's a live one at the bottom.

What is worse than that?

It eats its way out.

What is worse than that?

It comes back for seconds.

What's the hardest part of running through a field of dead babies?

My boner.

What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?

I don’t put fruit in a blender.

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mercedes?

I don’t have a Mercedes.

So, a woman gives birth to a child, and the doctor grabs it by the leg and holds it upside down. Then, he starts swinging it around the room, slamming it into the furniture. The mother tries to get up and starts screaming and crying, “Let my baby go, you sick bastard!” The doctor looks at the mother and stops swinging the baby. He is holding it by the left leg and starts chuckling, “I’m just kidding, it was already dead.”

My old platoon sergeant always told me the hardest thing when walking through a field of dead babies was... his cock.

Abortion is a really touchy subject for me. On one hand, there's dead babies! But on the other hand, women get a choice.