Newest Dad Jokes - Page 11 - Worst Jokes Ever

(This is a cruel joke, do not say this to anyone it just popped up in my mind)

Roses are Red Violet's are blue yo grandma died, yo dad left you too, now you living with yo old grandma coot. 'oh' let's not forget yo mom left you to, you gon live alone, die alone, with no roses on yo casket too.

What do you say to the orphan Shut up get a mom and dad

Orphan: Hey wheres the milk Dad: . . .

My mom when we got my dog

Dad: doesn't want dog.
Family: gets dog anyway.
Dad and dog:

Like if you can relate and comment if you think this is funny

7 y/o me in my dad's car: Dad,
I wanna turn on the light. Can
I press this button?
My dad:
No!! That's the button that will kill everyone

I think my dad love jokes

because he laugh when he look at me

Little Johnny saw his dad getting head from his mom. Johnny asked what they were doing and mom stopped and said she was fixing his dads pants. Little Johnny says "That explains what the lady next door was doing"

Roses are red Violet are blue ur dad bought you

Why should you abuse the hell out of an orphan? Because what are they gonna do? Tell their mom or dad?

I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike I just collect body parts

Sara opens her lunch and reads the letter inside. "I packed your favorite -love mom," Sara reaches in and announces "yay PB and J," Tom goes in his lunch and pulls out a letter " go bye your self something healthy at the cafeteria -Dad," then pulls out 20 bucks and says "nice," they both look at craig as he pulls out a letter. craig reads the letter in his head, it said "WE HAVE YOUR PARENTS, THEY TELL US THEY KEEP THE MONEY UNDER THER BED. BRING $10 000 TO THE RANDAVOU POINT OR THEY WILL BE KILLED. YOU DIDN'T TAKE US SERIOUSLY LAST TIME SO THERE IS MORE PROOF IN YOUR LUNCH." Craig throughs down the letter and pulls a finger out of his lunch. Tom and Sara look shocked, then Craig says "ugh, severed finger, again!"

My dad told me to stop with the suicide jokes so I said I’ll cut it out

Dad: If you study, then I will buy you a new iPhone. Son: Okay, I'll do it! 5 hours later... Son: I'm done! Dad: I lied. Son: So did I!

My dad went out for milk. It's been 15 years and I still have to eat my cereal dry.

The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening. "Sure honey! If you suck my dick! So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!" "Oh yeah, I forgot" says the father "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."