Why are emo’s jealous of light?
The lights are hanging.
Never compare an orphan to an Apple because the Appel all ways gets pick.
All those people claiming Donald Trump is like Hitler need a reality check. After all, its not like Donald Trump could write a book.
I told a Chinese man, which is better, Cats or dogs. He said dogs. I say why? He said because dogs tasted better Than cats
What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them the looser they get
A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money. The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed. The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed. The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed. The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money,.....Then he married the one with the biggest tits.
What’s the difference between Juice WRLD and George Floyd Nothing they both can’t breath
One person said you are much more beautiful than Cinderella, the next day, your in court and Cinderella is the witness. ( P.S. she was born to be a drama queen. )
Simplest way to tell if dogs are better than cats. My dog is named curiosity, and your cat is dead
What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda? Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda....
Adolf Hitler + Vladimir Putin = Vladolf Putler
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period? One is finger-licking good and the other is just a fast-food restaurant.
When I was your age, we had Wacko Jacko, not Florida Man.
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke and it asked me “what is the difference between a large pizza and you”one can feed a family
What do Hitler and trump have in common they both do hand gestures.
What is a similiarity between priests and doctors?
They both have fetishes for their professions
Your hairline looks like they Mac Donald’s sign M
Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing? Me: Sure.. ( Expecting a completely different response than what I get. ) Sister: Nvm, they have no difference. Me: * Confused * Sister: They're both horrible.
What's the difference between a speed bump and rode kill
About 40 mph
When someone saw your hairline they thought it was a dorito logo
