Comic Book jokes

Your hairline looks like the Batman symbol.

Yo mama is so ugly, she makes the Flash stop dead in his tracks.

What is the difference between Batman and Black Panther?

Batman returns.

What’s the difference between Batman and the Black Panther?

Batman returns.

My son told me he wanted to be Batman when he grows up. That little shit wants to be gunned down in an alley.

What superhero will orphans never understand?

Homelander.

They told me Avengers: Endgame was going to be 3 hours long, but honestly? I felt like it was over in a SNAP!

What is Spiderman's favorite rice?

Uncle Ben's.

Cause they about to taste my Morbius! I got that acrimonious odious Cause the bats are copious My blood flow is harmonious Bout to act felonious You know they hating us And we getting treasonous Woo when they get bit with the Morbius! I got that acrimonious odious Cause the bats are copious My blood flow is harmonious Bout to act felonious You know they hating us And we getting treasonous Woo when they get bit with the (Morbius) (Morbius) (Morbius) (Morbius) (Morbius) Morbius (His name is Dr. Michael Morbius)

What do you call a rich orphan?

Batman.

I told some orphan that you can see your family, but I meant Spider-Man: Homecoming...

You know why they call her Wonder Woman?

She's always wondering where she parked her invisible jet.

What did one orphan say to the other?

Quick, Robin! To the Batmobile!

I need more webs and I need more supplies for more webs, how do I make them? With spiders!

There is a dark alley. Who do you call?

Batman.

I would rather do my own laundry, not my uncle's laundry, because I ain't no damn butler like Alfred from Batman. I don't live in no damn Batcave by Gotham tity.

Orphan: I want to be like Batman.

Orphan worker: You are already like him, honey.

Sixteen Sodium particles walk into a bar, followed by Batman.

Why doesn't Batman have super vision?

His parents died.

Superman was bored and wanted to go out. He called all his super friends, but they were all busy. He even calls Louis, but it's her time of the month.

He flies to the liquor store and buys some beer and gets drunk. As he is flying, he sees Wonder Woman naked on top of the roof. He starts thinking, "I will fly down and have sex with her sooooo fast," BURP, "that she won't know what happened," HICKUP.

He flies to her faster than the speed of light, BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG, and flies away with a smile. He passes out and crashed into a wall.

Wonder Woman jumps up and screams, "WHAT WAS THAT?"

The Invisible Man appears, holding his butt, and he gets off on Wonder Woman and says, "I don't know, but my butt hurts real bad."