Canning jokes

What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?

Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.

What’s the difference between weed and pussy?

If you can smell weed from across the room, it means the weed's good.

Where can white people cook better than Black people?

On Father’s Day.

Where can a gay male that is abled bodied find the location of a glory hole if he is looking for a free and anonymous blowjob from another gay male?

From a physically disabled gay male who is either at the gym 💪 💪 🏋️‍♂️ or at the rest area ♿️ 🚹 🚽.

My wife and I have decided that we do not want children.

If anybody does, please send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

My wife (or husband) told me to get six cans of Sprite from the grocery store.

I had just realized when I got home that I had picked up 7-Up.

I like Christmas.

It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁

I have a fish that can breakdance, but only for 20 seconds and only once.

There are perks to bringing an emo to the grocery store; you can get coupons by scanning their wrist.

Why do orphans like robbing banks?

So they can be wanted.

One like and whatever you say in the comments I'll do, but one rule: it can only be 2-4 hours in or out of Gloucestershire and South Gloucestershire.

Wanna know who can jump the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.

Hey guys, can we stop making these jokes? If my mom sees this, I will never see the sun again.

Oh . . .

:(

Continue.

Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.

Hey, can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives you two nights in a row.

How can you tell a Pokémon likes baseball?

Every night he turns into a Golbat.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Well, it depends how hard you can throw.

Why can orphans get away from the FBI?

Because they don't have a house.

Your mama's so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, you can see Micah.

A burger walks into a bar and says, "Hi sir, can I have a glass of water?"

And the waiter says, "I'm sorry sir, we don't serve food here."