Canning jokes

Pigeons can be annoying at times, especially when their bones get stuck in-between your teeth.

How can you find out how old a cabbage is?

By looking at its cabbAGE.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Please.

Please who?

Police, can you stop talking so we can get to the end of the joke.

Lol.

Hey babe, I’m looking to get 23 years in 23 seconds, can you help?

What do you call roller skates you can walk in?

"Wock n' roll."

When you're mad, you might as well just punch an orphan because what can they do, tell their parents?

Q: Why do men say "ladies first?"

A: So they can look at their a**.

Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?

Of course, houses can't jump.

My father can take a joke because he made one.

A magician is driving, but then he "turns" into a driveway.

If you get this joke, you have no personality at all. Send all the help you can get:).

What do you call a fish that can use a katana?

A salmon-rai.

Can you see me?

How can you make a orphans hand bleed?

Real them to clap until there parent come home.

El, can you grab me that bow?

Comedy is so woke these days. You can't make fun of any disadvantaged group.

Except people with Alzheimer's. They'll just forget you made the joke in five minutes anyway.

Joe Rogan to Christopher Doemges: "What can you tell me about musicians of the 18th century?" Doemges: "They're all dead already!"

Charlie Chaplin and Tork Poettschke meet.

Chaplin: "What can I do for you?"

Poettschke: "Please get away from me."

Waitress: What can I get for you?

Me: I'll have a steak.

Waitress: How would you like it?

Me: Immediately!

You can tell if a woman is angry if she is holding a gun.

Caution: Looking at your hairline can cause you to be delirious and have hallucinations.