Canning jokes

Why do orphans like going to church?

They can actually call someone "father."

Who can jump the highest?

Emo kids, some are still in the air.

What's the difference between Jesus and Christmas tree lights?

They can both flash.

Deez nuts, can we get much higher?

Boioioioing boioioioing, my name Jeff.

Arabic Nokia ringtone, bingchungus, wholesome 100, everyone liked that, Keanu Reeves chungus, Ugandan Knuckles, YouTube poop XDDDDDDDDDDDD.

What can you catch, but not throw?

You're so bald, I can see what's on your mind.

Just a pickup line.

"Ayo, bbg, are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in."

Why do orphans like to be gay?

So they can call someone "daddy."

What's the difference between a hippie chick and a can of Spam?

After 6 months in the woods, you'll still eat the can of Spam.

Why can't orphans have sex? Because they have no one to call "daddy."

Hi, I'm Depraashin.

Hi, I'm rope. May I hang with you guys?

Why can orphans get away with being bad at school?

They do not have parents to bring to parent/teacher conferences.

Doctor: I’m so sorry, sir, but you only have a couple months left.

The sir: My children will be devastated.

Doctor: But I have a shot that can change that.

The sir: Whatever it takes.

*Suppressed gunshots*

What's an orphan's favorite sport?

Baseball, because that's the only time they can run home.

Did you know that an orphan can take a selfie and a family photo at the same time?

Dear Kenya, love of life,

Thanks for commenting on my jokes, and thanks for being a nice person to me! Love, Jaden. You can tell by the emojis 🥰😍❤️💞!

Love you a million times more!

How do you put a baby in a blender feet first so you can see its facial expressions?

How do you get the baby out? With a tortilla chip!

Helen Keller can use Hodled's words because they are so bad.

Why can an orphan relate to a pack of bananas?

Because they both split away from their family.

How can you tell that a woman is asking for sex? Wait for her to drop a bomb on you.