Canning jokes

Add joke

Not a joke, but this needs saying. Please can someone do something about all the pedo posts on here. It’s honestly just nasty.

How many skinny people can fit in a tub? I don't know; they keep slipping down the drain.

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before kicking the bucket: "Hey, wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"

I can swallow two pieces of string and when they come out the other end, they'll be tied together. I shit you knot.

Hey, I know this is a classic joke but I found it pretty funny!

"My name is 4, four like the number," my friend said. "What, was 1 2 3 taken?"

I can even with it but I was bored and decided to share this.

  • 4
  • 1

    • Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject. Now you can talk about Botox, and nobody raises an eyebrow.

    Girl: Hey.

    Orphan: Hi.

    Girl: Wanna be friends?

    Orphan: Sure.

    Girl: Ok, and go ask your parents if we can have a sleep over.

    They say we have a primal sense, that we can just feel when someone is watching us.

    It’s been a few weeks, and it's clear that you do not have that sense.

    Why do more men than women support abortion? So they can keep raping women and the victims will just abort their kids to not have to relive the experience!

    Two cyclists stop on a bridge. One cyclist says to the other, "Can you see that forest over there?"

    The other says, "No, the trees are in the way."

    Did you know an orphan is deeply religious because they can finally call someone "father."

    If a furry looks like an animal, sounds like animal, and acts like an animal, can I run over it with my car like an animal?

    I was raped everyday for years. I can still smile. I hold the record for the widest asshole.