Who wants me to bring back the daily School Shooyer Jokes
Why did the girl bring the Ladder to school because she wanted to go to high school
Three friends are in a hotel room in Soviet Russia. The first two men open a bottle of vodka, while the third is tired and goes straight to bed. He is unable to sleep however, as his increasingly drunk friends tell political jokes loudly.
After a while, the tired man gets frustrated and walks downstairs for a smoke. He stops in the lounge and asks the receptionist to bring tea to their room in five minutes.
The man walks back into the room, joins the table, leans towards a power outlet and speaks into it:
"Comrade major, we want some tea to room 62 please."
His friends laugh on the joke, until there is a knock on the door. The receptionist brings a teapot. His friends fall silent and pale, horrified of what they just witnessed. The party is dead, and the man goes to sleep.
After a good night's rest, the man wakes up, and notices his friends are gone. Surprised, he walks downstairs and asks the receptionist where they went.
The nervous receptionist whispers that KGB came and took them before dawn.
The man is horrified. He wonders why he was spared.
The receptionist responds:
"Well, comrade major did quite like your tea joke."
So a woman walks into a magician's toy store and browses the collection. Among which was a black, phallic-looking object. She brings it to the counter and asks, "what's this?". The cashier explains that it's a magical dildo that will listen to whatever you say, "fuck me in the ass", it'll float in the air and fuck you in the ass, "fuck me in the pussy", it'll float in the air and fuck you in the pussy, "faster", it'll go faster, "harder", it'll go harder. She bought this magical artifact and went home for a night of fun and pleasure.
After receiving several orgasms from the magical dildo, she'd had enough, and she told it to stop, but it didn't. The dildo continued to penetrate her, it would go harder and faster, but it refused to stop or slow down. In a panic, she ran over to her car and drove to the hostpital to get it surgically removed. Her panic made her disregard the traffic rules, and she quickly found herself pulled over by a cop. As she pulled down her window, the cop leaned towards the door and asked "Do you have any idea how fast you were going!?", the woman tried to explain the situation, she told the officer about the magical dildo stuck in her pussy, but the officer didn't believe her, "magical dildo, my ass" he said, and the lady drove home.
Parents; Lets have a bonfire Me; Lets go to the orphanage parents;to bring other children? Me; No to have the fire parents; wont they be missed? Me; No because there is nobody to miss them
How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer...?
A: None, it should be opened by the time she brings it.
to RANDYYYY,
hi randy this is ALYA i dont want. to fight with you if your an orphan and you do know about your past you probably get sad right? well these jokes just bring up the bad times up for me.
-ALYA with love
Why did the Nurse bring a read pen to work? To draw Blood Why did the M&M go to school? to be a smartie. Why did the monkey bring a ladder to school? to be in highschool.
a man went into a libary to get a book on how to commit sucide the libarian said "no you won't bring it back
A man asked for poison and another man gave it to him. The first man took a sip and said, "hmmm this tastes like arsenic." He took a sip of another and said, "hmmm this tastes like cyanide. A very unpleasant taste that brings back memories."
This is how my mom always threatens me: I brought you into this world, I can bring you out of it too. That's why I only have 2 siblings left.
I wonder where the bodies are?
Why can happen if you bring a hooker in a stranger's house he will ask you really are you nuts?
A young orphan boy goes to school for the first time. A bigger boy comes and punches him. He says,”What are you gonna do, cry to your mommy?” The boy cries. Next morning, he wakes up and comes to school. The same thing happens, but the older boy brings his friends. This time, after he says,”You gonna tell your mom?”, the little boy says, Yes, I will tell them that there is company coming over.
hey join me i be near the tree bring things to
A new feature that we are bringing to the Olympics is 3D viewing. So if you're watching the javelin, I would look away now.
Teacher:every1 tomorrow is bring your mom to school day Me:srry but my moms not gonna make Teacher:why Me: im an orphan bitch
America has white people that are terrorists and racists. They love to blame people from different countries for what they have done.
White person: We are not terrorists. Why would ever do that in our history? The rest of the people: *looks at them stupid* Yall were the first mother fuckers to be a terrorist first and then wanting to blame others for your action.
1 person: You still carrying that confederate flag. It means hatred and still trying to fight to bring back slaves again. Yall say it's heritage and not hate but clearly still a fucking loser and your flag has an X means wrong. So... Still a loser. People can't be racist to a racist. It just doesn't make sense. Im not saying all white people are racist but I am talking about the ones who voted for trump and be blind as hell. FUCK DONALD TRUMP AND THE RACIST PEOPLE>
Why would you leave a damn gorilla out in the middle of the parking lot after you let the zookeeper bring a chimpanzee home from the zoo because my and the gorilla had too much to drink.
When the autistic kid brings a gun to school and thinks it’s a dart gun
why did the astronaut bring the seeds to space. because he wants to planet the seed🤣🤣🤣
