Bears jokes

Girl

How do you make an 8 year old girl cry twice?

Wipe your bloody cock off on her favorite teddy bear.

Koala

Why aren’t koalas actual bears?

They don’t meet all the koalifications!

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  • Bear

    Little Johnny walks in on his mom taking a shower and slips and falls under her, and he says, "What's that, Mama?" She says, "That's just an old bear." He says, "He's a mean bear." She says, "Why's that?" He says, "He's got blood in on eye and shit in the other."

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  • Koala

    Why is the koala not a bear?

    It doesn't have the right koalafications.

    Memes

    Bear

    Why did the loo 🚽 roll roll down the stairs? To get to the bottom.

    What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

    Polar Bear

    How do you catch a polar bear?

    Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.

    Inch

    A fly is 6 inches above water, and a fish sees it and it leaps out and gets the fly. Then a bear grabs the fish and eats it. Then a hunter shot the bear, and a mouse saw some crackers and then leaped on the cracker and ate it. Then a cat runs down to get the mouse, trips, and falls into the water, and that's the story of how six inches can get a pussy wet.

    Girl

    How do you make an eight-year-old girl cry twice?

    Wipe your bloody cock off on her favorite teddy bear after you’ve raped her.

    Gummy bear

    Warning: if you don't like gummy bears, DO NOT READ.

    Q: What do you call a Mexican gummy bear?

    A: Delici-Oso

    Man

    "Brown bear, brown bear, what do you see?" I see a blind man looking at me.

    "Blind man, blind man, what do you see?"

    Oh sorry, I forgot you can't see.

    Gun

    What's the difference between a bear with a gun and an American man with a gun?

    The bear has common sense not to fire it.

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  • Child

    Mary: If you born pikin (child) inside shop, wetin you go call that pikin (child)?

    Mike: The pikin (child) go bear Bishop.

    Bear

    What do you get when you mix a grizzly bear and milk? Mauled.

    Bacon

    Kermit the Frog and Fozzie Bear were having a picnic.

    Fozzie said, "Do you know where Ms. Piggy is? I haven't seen her all day."

    Kermit said, "I don't know, but this extra bacon cheeseburger sure tastes great."