Baseball

Baseball jokes

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Copycat

  • You're a copycat from Ballarat You smell like a rat, you wear a hat and you are shaped like a baseball bat.

    Song by John Rizk

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    Ball

  • My boyfriend and I were playing baseball last night with some of our friends. Halfway through the game we took a break and he asked me to hold his balls for him whilst he went to the toilet.

    All our friends were shocked when I went into the boys' bathroom with him.

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    Orphan

  • Why didn’t the orphan play baseball?

    Because I took the bat and swung it at their kneecaps, and now they can’t run. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

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    Orphan

  • Why are orphans running around the world after the baseball coach said, "Go home"?

    Because he didn’t know what the hell to do.

    Orphan

  • Why can't orphans play baseball? Because there's no home.

    What is the difference between an apple tray and an orphan? The apples get picked.

    Lady

  • Lady: "Can I lick your balls?"

    Me: "Ummmmm, ok?"

    Lady: *grabs ball sack and licks my balls*

    Me: "I'm gonna have to clean these now!"

    Lady: "Let me do that."

    Me: "No, thank you! I have to use these baseballs for practice!"

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