Bars jokes
A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "Give me 2 beers." The bartender gives him two beers and coughs in the guy's beer bottles before giving it to him. The guy says to the bartender, "Hey, what are you doing? I didn't order Bud Lights, I want Corona beer." The bartender replies, "Sir, I gave you a mix of Bud Light and Corona, and it's on the house, everyone is drinking Corona tonight."
How do you fit 3 gay men on a bar stool?
Flip it upside down.
Three men walk into a bar. The 1st says, "Hey, how's it going?" The 2nd one says, "Great!" But then the 3rd man says, "Hello, where did my wife go? I swear she was just here!" What happened to the 3rd guy's wife?
Why do emo people go to the store with no money?
Because they just scan their bar code and get everything free.
Stephen Hawking walks, I mean rolls into a bar.
When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.
How can you buy emos? Just use their bar code.
A dolphin swims into a bar and looks at the menu. He calls the bartender and orders a pint of ginger-whale.
So, Stephen Hawking walked into a bar—oh, wait a minute! Rewind!
So, Stephen Hawking rolled into a bar......
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar... Ha!
Copy and paste in your search bar to see watersharky's worst picture on HIS OWN DOCS.
Why did the oxygen molecules walk out of the singles bar with excitement?
Because she got Avogadro's number!
A man walks into a bar... and he never walks out.
A blind man walks into a bar...
And then a chair.
And then a table.
So Steven Hawking walks into a bar...
Just kidding!
Why did the rapper bring a clock to the concert?
Because he wanted to spit BARS on time.
An Irish man walks out of a bar. It can happen.
Two Timetravers walk into a bar...
...the bartender then said, "Sorry, we don't serve Timetravers here."
A man walks into a bar.
Ouch!
I walked in a sushi bar, and the sushi chef looked very o-fish-all!