Asking out jokes

Today I was asked to go out by 17 women. Well, I was in the women's bathroom. 💀

Friend: I'm gonna go ask out my crush.

Me: *fake sneezes* Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit.

A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid."

The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what?"

Why were you born?

Because I asked out your mom on accident.

Today I was asked to go out by 20 girls. -- I was in the women's bathroom.

Like if you have a boyfriend, girlfriend, or husband, or wife, or a crush.

Girl: "...I like you... do you like me back?"

Me: "Nope."

Girl: *is depressed* "Oh okay...."

Me: "You never said \"love\"".

Girl: "Oh! well do you love me?"

Me: "Frick no."

Can some hot depressed suicidal guy give me his number so we can cry about being depressed and wanting to die?

Guys, help! I need advice to confess to my crush. I'm being for real right now, guys, help!