Appearance jokes

"Orla Doyle is fit."

What am I if my neck is covered in red bumps, my ears are the size of a giant corn cob, my skin is ruby red, my eyes are bloodshot, I have green skin, and fur growing all over my body? Horribly ugly.

Yo mama so ugly Donald Trump said "wrong!"

Yo mama is so ugly, when she looked at the mirror, I cracked up.

You're so ugly that I choked and died.

Yo mama so ugly, when she go to church they say it's a demon!

Some kid in a wheelchair called me fat.

I told her, "Do a wheelie!"

You're so ugly, you have trick-or-treat on the phone!

Want to see a funny joke? Look in the mirror.

I suggested to my girlfriend that she would look sexier with her hair back.

Apparently, that’s insensitive to someone during chemo.

Your hairline's so ugly, it turned Medusa to stone!

Bro, go work at McDonald's. Your hairline inspired their logo!

Your hairline is so big even Dora the Explorer can't explore it!

You look like a double dipped chocolate chip cliff flipped glazed charcoal slim jim Mr. clog hunch frap, no feet, 9 arms, 17 stomachs. You stepdad beat you with a wiffle ball bat. NBA Youngboy was in your bathroom spitting on you and now you got herpes on your left side cheek.

Your hairline is so far back my dad even took 48 hours to reach it.

Your hairline is so far back that when I put on my glasses, I thought I saw an "M" for McDonald's on your hairline.

His hairline is so ugly that Martin Luther King had a dream about it.

Your hairline goes so far back even history can’t record it.

Your hairline is so ugly, it's stretching down to Bikini Bottom.

Bro, is your hairline and your forehead good friends because they go way back?