ANS jokes

Emo

  • Why is it bad to high five an emo?

    They will leave themselves hanging.

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  • Cock

  • A cock really has a sad life. He's hairs a mess, his neighbor's an arsehole, his best friend is a cunt.

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  • Abortion

  • Want to hear an abortion joke, or any joke for that matter? You have that option, and you can thank your mother for that.

    But that's a question that will never be heard by an aborted unborn baby, whose only option was death. And that's no joke.

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  • Dictionary

  • I was in an argument with a "friend" at school. He said, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."

    ...so I threw a dictionary at him.

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  • Orphan

  • What's the difference between a watermelon and an orphan?

    One you cut into 2 with a knife.

    And the watermelon you cut into pieces.

    Orphan

  • How do you get an orphan sad?

    You say you will tell their mom that they have been a baaaaaad boy.

    Orphan

  • Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.

    Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."

    Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______

    New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.

    Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."

    Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.

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  • Penaldo

  • As an honest Penaldo fan, I have to admit he is a penalty merchant. He can only score against farmer teams like Spezia. He never shows up against great teams like Barcelona.

    I've come to realize my hero Penaldo will never be better than Messi. My idol Penaldo is sadly finished.

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