ANS jokes
You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!
What type of flour do you buy an orphan? Self-raising.
lowkey "discharge" is an ugly word. I prefer créme de la meow meow.
If you have a bad day, go tell an orphan to find his parents. He will be searching all day.
What is an emo kid's favorite song?
"Chain Hang Low" because he hangs low off a chain tied to a tree.
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A self-portrait.
I offered to share a meal with a homeless person once, but he said, "Piss off and buy your own!"
You never think of how people will react to an event. My friend gets discounts at any store he goes to.
Why can't an orphan have a phone?
Because they will see a home.
People are like trees. They fall when you hit them multiple times with an axe.
I pushed an orphan in a wheelchair into a fire and yelled, "Hot wheels!"
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't go home.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
EXPERIMENT SUCCESSFUL 😱😱 Scientists have created an element named Pessomium 😳😳
Characteristics: - Highly reactive only in Bolivia and Panama 😡🤬 - Turns invisible when in Brazil or Uruguay 🥵🤧 - Finished 😹🤕 - 0 protons 0 electrons 0 goals 0 assists 7 debuts 🥶
What's an orphan's favorite part in the Wizard of Oz?
When Dorothy says, "There's no place like home."
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You make them clap until they go home.
What is an orange cucumber?
A carrot, duh!
What story does an orphan always get kicked out of? Home Depot.
If an orphan wants food, who does it? No one. Everybody just watches him starve because they couldn't find his parents.