ANS jokes

Orphan

10 views ·

I was on an orphan's website, but I pressed on his profile and realized he had no home page.

Word

64 views ·

Satanism is such an ugly word. I prefer the term, "red skin appreciation."

Emo

1 view ·

If you were to drop an emo and a leaf off a tree, who would hit the ground first?

The leaf, because the emo is always hanging.

Suicide

36 views ·

What's the difference between an orgy and mass suicide?

When exactly my cult members drink the Kool-Aid.

Amputee

10 views ·

My buddy and I both wanted to marry a woman who happened to be an amputee.

Sadly, my buddy won her heart, but I got her leg.

Pickpocket

10 views ·

Three men met on a nude beach. Two of the three men were happy, but the third was sad.

The three men broke into a conversation. The topic eventually reached the men's jobs, and why they were at the beach.

"I'm a construction worker," said the first man. "All year long I toil in the sun in very heavy clothes, so this seemed like the perfect vacation for me. If I can relax and do it naked, that's a win-win."

"I'm an accountant," said the second man. "I just like how everyone here is dressed exactly the same."

The first two men turned to the third, sad man. "What do you do?" they asked.

"I'm a pickpocket," said the third man. "My doctor sent me here."

9/11

99 views ·

I have a pen, I have an Apple, um, Apple pen.

The Taliban had a plane, the US had a building boom, 9/11.