And jokes

Hairline

Health and safety tips: Looking at your hairline is hazardous. For your best interest, please look away.

Mama

Yo mama so ugly when she looked in the mirror, her reflection threw up and ran away.

Game

Every time my cousin and I, we settle it out with our game, so we play rock paper scissors. 😂🤣🤣

Knock

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Goliath.

Goliath who?

I need to Goliath down and sleep!

Memes

Orphan

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

Apples get picked.

Stalin

Stalin asked Hitler if he wants to hear a joke.

Hitler says, “Yes.”

Stalin then says, “Moscow.” Hitler replies with “I don’t get it?”

Stalin laughs for a long time and says, “And you never will.”

Difference

What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?

If you want a female prostitute to be a carpet muncher, you have to give her money.

Restaurant

One time I was playing a bongo at a Chinese restaurant.

But they were competing against a Cuban restaurant and killed me.

Job

One time, I worked at 3 jobs at the same time and my boss said it was illegal.

It got too out of hand and I got spanked.

Name

What is your name? What am I pointing at? 👃🏽 And what am I holding? Hahaha!!!!! Knows nothing.

Eagle

What do a mole and an eagle have in common?

They live underground, except for the eagle. Lol.

Hairline

Your hairline and forehead must be friends, because they go way back further than the universe.

Hairline

Caution: Looking at your hairline can cause you to be delirious and have hallucinations.

Wife

There once was a man who beat his wife, And before he even knew it, he ended her life. His hands were a mess, all red and bloody, He had to find somewhere to hide the body.