And jokes
What is the difference between an orphan and a cat?
The cat is actually cute.
What's the same thing between a baby and a grenade?
They both make a sound when thrown.
Why do Indian guys never have gfs? Because they always pick curry and biryani over girls.
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre.
Sometimes I look in the mirror and go, "What happened?"
Memes
What do you get when you cross a belt and a watch?
A waist of time.
Both man and woman have balls, but they like to play with the ball of each other because a person always loves what they don't have. 😁
I was always told as a kid that I have to pick between being a programmer and an English teacher.
They said: you can't be a "pro-grammer nazi."
What is it called when 21 Savage and 6ix9ine fight: Alien vs. Predator?
FEMA during a natural disaster is kinda like me during sex. Slow to respond and not a lot of satisfying results.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
There was a guy called Manners, one called Poo, and one called Shut Up.
One day, Manners was on his way to pick up Poo from school. A police officer stopped Shut Up and said:
Police: "What’s you name?"
Shut Up: "Shut Up."
Police: "Where's your manners?!"
Shut Up: "Picking up Poo."
What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?
Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"
Person: You suck!
Me: Tell that to your mom, and she’ll say the same thing, honey. 😎
I got a new job at a trampoline park the other day. If I’m being honest, it’s got its ups and downs.
Q: What's brown and sticky?
A: A stick :)
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?
Morgz.
Bin Laden was the hide and seek champion for 10 years, 2001-2011.