And jokes

Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"

The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"

BOINGZINGA!?!

DARK ALERT********

A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.

DARK ALERT********

My mom is bad and my dad is bad.

What does a baby and a grenade have in common?

They both make noise after you throw them.

I burnt down an orphanage and then showed an orphan the orphanage that I burned down, and he loved it. Not really, though.

What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking during a house fire.

What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.

What’s the difference between a Rubik's cube and a penis? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

What gets hard when tugged and fits perfectly in between boobs... A seatbelt.

I pushed an orphan and they said, "I'm telling!" I asked, "Telling who? Your parents?"

Today I was asked what I wanted to be, and I said I wanted to be a pinata because I want to be hanged.

I got in trouble today because I threw a lamp at the emo kid and said, "Lighten up!"

If somebody gives you lemons, cut them in half and do the juice in his eyes.

Orphans are pretty tough. I mean, you never see them running home...

If I was an object in this world, I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge, I will likely shatter and break.

After 9/11, the Twin Towers began to vape and smoke weed... 😔

Can't be bothered with jokes, me and Syd Drake f**k 24/7.

How do you cut your grass without a lawn mower?

You dye it blue and it will cut itself.

What do you call a kid with an eyepatch and no arms or legs? Names.

How do you see the difference between a cow and a bull? It’s either one or the udder.